Lessons. We all have them. But if you don’t really learn those lessons, you will repeat them over and over again, until you finally “get” it. Relationships can be an important lesson, and along with the struggle and pain, you overcome some major life challenges. There’s confusion, insecurity, sadness, anger and broken hearts but they actually bring you to a healthier place – for the next significant relationship.
You become stronger and are able to overcome the peaks and valleys better with each lesson learned. You become aware of what you want and don’t want in a relationship and are able to make decisions based on what is best for you. It is very liberating and empowering to know that if one person rejects you, that person was not really right and that someone better is coming along.
It feels good to be strong and responsible for how your life unfolds and to know that a rejection does not mean you are bad or unworthy. It just means that you can change, if you choose, to create a better, healthier, more satisfying future for yourself. The more you value yourself, the easier it becomes to get past “the past” and move into the future with confidence and esteem.
The challenge of all relationships is to be yourself and to be comfortable in your own skin. If you approach a new relationship from a place of fear or insecurity, it will be obvious to the person you meet. To attract the kind of man who sees you as self-confident and desirable, you need to feel it too. So, don’t be afraid to be vulnerable again — to get into a relationship and feel love and joy, because this time it may be the real thing, which is what you deserve and have been looking for all along.
Amy Sherman, MA, is a Relationship Coach, Author and Therapist. She co-wrote “99 Things Women Wish They Knew Before Dating After 40, 50 and Yes, 60!” which offers tips, tools and insights into avoiding common relationship mistakes. She can be reached at email@example.com for individual coaching.