Online darting, especially after age 50 or 60, can be quite different from past relationship experiences. Be prepared for new challenges and new levels of awareness. Meeting prospective new partners can be exciting. However, you need to be cautious when dating in today’s world. Keep your antenna up and be alert. Have fun, but also be concerned about your safety! Here are some valuable tips to ensure you are dating safely and wisely.
Crucial safe dating tips to follow:
- When meeting for the first time, don’t let your date to pick you up at your home. Never provide your home address or other personal details!
- For first or second dates, always meet in a safe public place where other people are in close proximity. Another option is to go out with a group of people, or a double date.
- Be diligent and never let your guard down on a first date. Don’t get fooled by reassuring words. Never assume, for example, that a man is safe because he claims to be religious, a “gentleman” or a nice guy .
- Trust your instincts. If something doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t. If you haven’t met him before and sense from the beginning of the date that something doesn’t feel right, then leave immediately. Be polite, but safety first!
- Be alert. When chatting via email, text or phone, pay attention. You can get a “take” on characteristics, quality traits or values from these conversations. Is he rigid or controlling? Does he seem to anger easily? Is he avoiding some of your questions? These can be red flag warnings that it’s time to move on.
- Never share your last name, address, workplace, phone number, or any other identifying information when corresponding online. Maintain anonymity until you feel you are in safe company.
- Try the surprise call test. Call your date at unscheduled times. If he really appreciates spending time with you, he will be pleased and not complain about your unexpected calls. Watch for signs of stress or inconsistency in behavior or messages. Always be alert for the unspoken nuances, inconsistent body language and voice tone and anything out of the ordinary.
- Never feel compelled to rush into dating. Neediness attracts users and manipulators. Take the time to know and trust your prospective date, especially before actually me. Learn and ask questions about his interests, beliefs, and habits. Listen to how he talks and responds to you. Be aware of how his mood changes. If you sense that something is wrong, trust your instinct on this. There probably is.
- Before dating online get a free anonymous e-mail account. Never give out your real email or name online. Feel free to change your online dating address and name if you feel you’re being hassled by anyone. Think safety at all times.
By following these tips you can enjoy rewarding dating experiences knowing you are protecting yourself through diligence and awareness.
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Rosalind Sedacca, CLC is a Dating in Midlife Mentor and Coach. She is co-author of 99 Things Women Wish They Knew Before Dating After 40, 50 & Yes, 60! She is also co-creator of the DatingRescue! 10-week eCourse for women and the Create Your Ideal Relationship Kit for women over forty. Learn more at: www.womendatingafter40.com and www.womendatingrescue.com.